I started out a complete bundle of nerves. Roux texted me on Thursday asking if I was busy Sunday and if he could come around to the farm... I said of course he could stop by - coincidentally, I also had my friend Jill, from Scuffed Boots Photography coming to do a photoshoot on the farm, but I figured I could juggle the both and if not, cross that bridge when I got to it.
As soon as mom caught wind that Roux was coming over, she started envisioning a giant dinner, and inviting him to stay - but even though they cajoled me multiple times between Thursday and Sunday, I was totally not interested in asking him in advance to stay for supper - too much pressure... so dad said "You're staying for supper, aren't you?" at some point early during his visit (which started at 1:30 and ended at roughly 9:30) and so he said yes and had the rest of the day to stay with us, I guess.
We went for a drive into the woods in his truck, then walked out a little farther so he could see some property he was thinking about. He didn't like the East facing slope of the property but he was pretty excited about the brook in it - overall, I don't think he has the kind of money to spend on the property, but he did want to go on a drive around the block to see if there were any other properties for sale.
When we got back, we dinked around in the barn for a while until Jill got there and then he hung around, and even helped out a little with the shoot, then we all had dinner... then we sat around the kitchen table, talking for ages... and then he helped me with the night chores and gave me a chaste hug when he left (it took that long to get rid of dad :P Ugh.). My parents almost like him more than I do!
Either way, I am so stoked about the pictures that Jill took. They mark a real turn in myself, I think. I am looking at these pictures thinking "I am frigging beautiful." where a year ago, I don't think I could have. And like it or lump it, I think the big boost in confidence is mostly thanks to Roux. I have had a great summer getting to know him, going back and forth and trying to figure things out, frustrating as it was, has been a big boost to me - getting some interest in return... I found myself more often than not, driving to work thinking "Man, I look cute today." Or "You know, I am really quite pretty." - and I never did anything different necessarily, just started thinking differently about myself. And now, I really just want to print these pictures out and run all over creation with them waving them in people's faces and going "Look how pretty my horse and I are!!"
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